The Battlefield

By Adil Raziq Wakil

Forward. I must keep moving forward. Can’t look back. Can’t change lanes. Forward. I see the end. If only I could reach it. I have heard how the others who did were rewarded. And how they were promoted. I must be patient. After all, I am allowed to move only one step a time.

What’s this? My path is blocked? And th-this person. His appearance is uncannily like mine. It’s like looking in a mirror. But it’s not. Something’s off. Quite unsettling to say the least. His armor. It’s of a different color. Our armors are completely contrasting. I remember now. All those who share same colored armors as me are allies. Funny how we are instructed to follow dress-codes in a battlefield, no? Anyways, what am I to do?  I have been trained to only shield my anterior. I can only kill those who face me obliquely. Move forward but kill diagonally. Is that perhaps strategy? To make way for the others? But then I am instructed to occupy the diagonal space if I have killed someone there. I think I might have a headache. Hush. Now is no time for thoughts.

He can’t kill me either it seems. Same instructions? Same training? Our shields are blocking each other. I can’t move to the space beside him. I am not allowed to if there isn’t an enemy to kill. Enemy? Why is the person standing in front of me an enemy? He hasn’t done anything to me. Come to think of it, we aren’t too different from them. Nothing too different from what we were told were the devils. Hush. I am harboring unhealthy thoughts again. I must not forget. All who contrast us must be punished.

I must move forward. Oh, I forgot. My path is blocked. What was I told to do in such a situation? Ah that’s right. I must halt. Halt and stay paralyzed until the enemy blocking is killed. How will he be killed I wonder? Maybe one of the higher-ups comes to my aid? That would be cool. Hush.

Thinking a higher-up would help me? I doubt one can get more ahead of themselves. But am I not also not dreaming to become one of the higher-ups? Forget it. I should think of a more probable medium of assistance. Perhaps one of my brothers pops by my side so that my enemy faces obliquely to him? My brother would be able to kill him then. This isn’t too far-fetched to think about now is it? But would not the arrival of my brother beside me enable the enemy to kill my brother too? Considering my enemy’s given the same training as I, he would be able to kill my brother in such a scenario, no? My path will be freed. But I don’t want to lose a brother. Not again. Please. Anything but that.

Why am I getting so agitated? I should think more rationally. Our strategic position is much better than the enemy’s. I don’t mind patiently waiting here if it means we will come out victorious. Oh look. It’s the clergy on the war elephant. He moves like a spear. He kills like me. Always at an angle. Come to think of it, I don’t think I have ever seen not move diagonally. He has great vision too. I would like to be given such a status. I’m already used to the killing style and won’t mind moving only in diagonals. If only I could reach the end.

What was that? Just now. I think I saw a bird? Oh. It’s the horseman. A warrior. He loves to move unpredictably. Always takes advantage of his horse to jump over anybody he can. He’s so used to it now, he jumps even if there’s no one. Always manages to catch enemies unguarded. So chaotic. So elusive. So disruptive. So erratic. So fearless. All very exciting. Promotion to such a position doesn’t sound quite bad. If only I could reach the end.

Oh. Something just brushed past me? Something fierce. Was that the chariot? Yes. The symbol of strength. The symbol of stability. A wall that cannot be breached. Epitome of defense. Yet attacks are lethal. Doesn’t need cunningness. Doesn’t need to rely on trickery. Doesn’t need to count on the element of surprise. Doesn’t need to be unpredictable. Has no limit to how much forward he can go. Has no limit to how much he can retreat. He moves sideways too. A treat to watch. So reliable. So powerful. So very strong. Being awarded such a status would be a dream come true. If only I could reach the end.

Just now. Something just approached me? Very fast. And that force. Unimaginable force. Authoritative movement. My thoughts are drifting me away. I should check on my friend. I might forget I am at war if I keep dreaming like this. Small talk? Something’s wrong. He doesn’t look like me anymore. He no longer looks like a wimp? He changed? In this short time? No way he promoted. He didn’t even reach his end though. It’s unfair. He looks so strong. So authoritative. Wait. He is clad in the same colored-armor as I. This isn’t the war elephant. Nor the horseman. Definitely not the chariot too. Wait don’t tell me. It’s the vizier. Yes. No doubt about it. Look at that form. That confidence in movement. No restrictions. Complete freedom. Master of the battlefield. To think that the vizier cleared my path? I feel so very lucky. I feel honored. Am I desired to be promoted? I feel so happy. I can march forward now. My mind is made up. I would definitely want to be promoted to a vizier. A matter of time now. When I reach the end.

What is this I hear? The voice is majestic. It’s enchanting. But I can’t quite recognize the figure. I thought the vizier was grand. But this personality. It’s magical. Enthralling even. Yet there is firmness. Authority. Controlling everyone. Giving orders. His armor. Color’s the same. I feel special. So very special. So this is authority. I see all others protecting this figure. He moves cautiously. He moves one step at a time. Doesn’t venture too far out. Moves only when strictly necessary. Everything rests on his shoulder. He is the planner. All strategies are his. The core of everything. I understand now. His safety is of utmost importance. Losing the war elephant, or the horseman, or the chariot is recoverable. Losing the vizier makes winning improbable, but not impossible. But this personality here. Losing him is losing the battle. Losing him is defeat. I must not let him down. Not the monarch. He has the power to promote me. When I reach the end.

My path is clear. The vizier, I observe, has been moved to a new position. Is the monarch paving my way? My heart. I have felt it beat for the first time. I was told I had one. Never believed it. Kept thinking I was only a puppet. Only a simple soldier who was there to make the enemies’ movements uncomfortable. But a carpet has been laid down for me it seems. A red carpet. Red with the enemies’ blood. I feel so very happy. The monarch would definitely want to award him who has penetrated the enemies’ defense completely with the grandest of positions. I glance at the vizier. I look at my future. Am I to be blamed to think I am given such a special treatment? Surely the monarch recognizes promoting me to vizier would improve our winning chances. The vizier has been lined up with enemy monarch who has to back into a corner to move out of the way. I feel excitement. The battle is approaching its end. The enemies’ monarch is under danger. Ours is safe. The battle is said to end when one of the two monarchs is under attack and no movement, of either him or of his minions, can protect him. I see the enemy monarch backed into a corner. I am very close to the end too. Only a matter of time. Victory first or promotion inviting victory? I wonder which.

The numbers have diminished. Too many live lost. But it will be worth it. I take a look back. I have come a long way. We have come a long way. The end is near. Victory is near. The enemy monarch has run out of movements of his own. His current position is safe. But moving any step would invite an attack from our side. We keep things this way. And then we bring our chariot to attack his current position. The battle will finally end. The enemy monarch is keeping the battle barely alive by ordering around his war elephant, the last of his army. My monarch has moved the chariot. I see. Perhaps promotion was not in my fate. He intends to end things here. I don’t mind it.

The chariot has to move in the space in front me. He would then directly be facing the enemy monarch. But the chariot cannot jump over me. Oh. I have been asked to move forward. My heart’s racing. So promotion really is in my destiny? I look at the enemy monarch. Our eyes meet. The other authoritative face. I had seen it fill with fear just now. When he was losing his army. When he lost his vizier. It’s filled with sadness now. I chuckle to myself. If it was the chariot who’s right behind me in this exact space, that would have been a dead face. I keep looking at him. His face faced filled with sorrow. But it was not for himself. He lost a lot in this war I guess. Hush. I am thinking too much again. Cannot harbor any feelings of empathy.

“…is commendable.” This is what I hear. An unfamiliar voice. I missed the first part of the sentence I think I felt honored to be cheered. But I feel pain. Losing so many people. I felt more pain. I was also the reason many lost their lives. Even if they were enemies. I had blood on my hands. No this reason isn’t enough either. Why am I feeling this pained? Oh I see. It’s from the spear which is piercing my heart. The clergy on the war elephant. His spear. In my heart. Which had only started beating now. “Your sacrifice is indeed commendable.” What? Oh. He appreciated me, I think. Suddenly, this is the most appreciated I have felt. He stands in my space. I hear the chariot slaughtering him. The enemy monarch has finally fallen. W- They have won at last. I couldn’t feel the spear for long. There’s still pain. I think I might have a faint idea of the cause. I also know now the true reason of the other monarch’s sorrow. Empathy. I suppose being empathetic doesn’t win you wars. I feel nothing now. Just a pierced heart. A broken one now. I do feel something. I feel dizzy.

By Adil Raziq Wakil