By Aastha Nagi
Green ghosts
If i am a star, she is my night sky, my darkness.
I can not be seen without my darkness surrounding me.
August
Chapter 1
Anyone could walk in and all of us would look up. Because that is how small the waiting room here is. Coming here every month means to see other humans who look like any one that has ever loved you would love them more. And that breaks me down. And so I dig claws into me every month till the blood threads that grow are tied in a prettier way. Anyone could walk in right now and all of us would try with everything in us to not look up but we all will. I dress lousy when I come here at the dentist every month and I regret it every month and I never change that every month. While we sit inside, dusk passes by outside. It is dark. It is starting to feel okay to breathe. And that is the moment all the heavens angels and all the gods above decide to bestow their wands upon my life. She walks in. She is dressed in black from head to toe. Her eyes are dark and her undereyes are decorated with dark. Black outlines her shy cannibalistic eyes. She looks like she does this everyday. Naturally, we all look only this time we look back down a little slowly. She does not look back at any of us. Is she an emo goth woman? Does she not get enough sleep? Does her life tire her? Does she make herself bleed? She sits with her head down and both her hands kind of holding each other. She has very fair skin. Black suits her. And even though it is clear that darkness is who she is, a blinding light surrounds her that scares away all us cowards from being able to stare at her. She is sitting right by the side of the door.
When it is my time to leave, I try to get a glance one last time.
I am never ever dressing lousy coming here again.
I don't know if she looked back at me. I don't remember.
Only I did not know that that was not the last time I would try to get one more glance.
I leave.
I think about her.
I forget.
I think about her.
I never see her at the dentist again.
October
Chapter 2
It is fall and I burn to ashes and am born again every night. The greatest fortunes happen in october. And so do the greatest tragedies. I want to live in October forever. I tell god thank you in october every day.
The crowd here is wild. All these probably live here. And i have grown up here, well partially, but the good part of my childhood growing up has been here yet i do not know more than most of these people here to celebrate today. The one person i do know is georgia. Ive known her since i was a child. When my mother and i used to come to stay here leaving my father and brother at home because my father was not a nice husband and i did not have my toys or skates or anything here, georgia would give me her bicycle. One time when i was 7 ,a car hit me and i fell, my mate asked me if i was okay and i said yes is the bicycle?. The man passing by laughed. A window separated mine and georgia's home. Well my partial home but more home than my real house. I have not talked to georgia in years. I love georgia. Right now she holds my hands and runs through this crowd and laughs. That's what georgia does. She jumps and she is laugh. And i know she has her issues but she is lively and she laughs. And i love her. I don't know where she is taking me. I just let her drive me through this madness and wildess. We’re running and I might trip and Georgia would just laugh. Georgia's friends have told me i look very pretty today, i condescendly say thank you.
Georgia is really having fun with this running and i am not questioning it. I cant make out the faces of the people we are running from.
I see her.
Is that her.
And i see rue. Next to her.
Holy gods of heavens above this is not happening.
Is that her
I know rue. Rue used to work for my mother and then she had college internships so she had to leave.
What is she doing here. Right next to rue. In my town. In my chicago (not literally)
She does not belong here. She belongs to big rich cities with rich shy cannabilistic cool people.
That can not be her.
That was even shorter than a glance. I scream at georgia when she stops later and finds a new ground and new view. “I saw a very pretty girl”
“What”
“I saw a very pretty girl take me there again”
“Who”
“GEORGIA THE GIRL WITH THE BLACK UNDER HER EYES”
Georgia laughs and her friends invade so i shut up.
The celebration ends and most people leave, all georgias friends leave.
“Come on ill show you the pretty girl now, how did she look”
“Dark hair, dark eyes, black under her eye-”
I see her. She is still there. With rue and another guy. Walking in circles around the park.
“Thats her”
“Oh mavis”
“Mavis?”
“Yes thats mavis”
“OKAY GEORGIA IM DYING HERE GIVE ME MORE”
“WHAT DO YOU WANT TO KNOW. THAT IS MAVIS”
“MAVIS WHO, WHERE DOES SHE LIVE WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE”
“She lives around here”
Okay what the actual fuck
“Around here where georgia?”
“I dont know around here, why do you want to know?”
“She comes to my dentist”
“She does?”
“Yes. why is she with rue”
“Oh you mean pony?”
“Since when is rues name pony?”
“Since always?”
Georgia is having way too much fun out of this. “Come lets tell her you think she is pretty”
“GEOGRIA no”
She takes my hands and starts to lead us there. “Georgia NO.”
I have way too many questions to be my quiet self right now. “Does she always have black under her eyes”
Geogia says yes,
“Do you know her? You talk to her?”
“No she does not talk to anyone, shes the mystery weird ass girl around here. Fuck talking she does not even look at people.”
Mavis is wearing a black baggy offshoulder with black pjs and god does she look like a goth rock cigarettes after sex song.
“So you dont know her?”
“No one knows her Felicity”
“I need you to find her id or her photos or anything”
“ WHAT drea oh my god do you like her”
“No i think she is pretty”
“Felicity you like her”
I let georgia tell me about her life, i listen and nod but i can not hear what she is saying. All i can think of is mavis. What is she like, where did she come from,how do i get her, there is something about her. Ive liked people before, they never felt like a rock goth cigrattes after sex song. She feels like that and i have never even felt her. I can tell what song she feels like and i have never even heard her.
When georgia is done, i ask her who the guy was, she tells me it was her brother. I find it hard to digest because i could never. I ask her what mavis is like, she looks like she cant seem to find the words. She says she doesnt know. She says about mavis, no one knows.
Will i be the first one then?
January
Chapter 3
Its past 10, its cold, its dark. Im the backseat passenger rotting princess and we’re heading to my partial home. To get there by car you have to squeeze through some time streets, streets that can only hold one car in the pathway and no humans with it at most.
We are going to spend the night there. Im in a white fur hoodie with my dark greesy hair up. I look drained and dead. And i am. We’re in those tiny streets when my car stops. I look up. Right next to me, or right infront of me, is mavis, rue and a guy, being separated by the car window. It is 10. What the fuck. I dont know what to do or who to look at so i look at rue and i smile. I dont remember if she sees it or smiles back. I think mavis looked and stared at me. I dont remember. I hope she did not. They could see every ugly swarming on my skin.
I shouldve looked at her. I have never truly looked at her. I dont know what she looks like. But i could point her out in a second in a crowded room. And i could recognize her by the back of her head. But ive never truly looked at her. Maybe it is her fare angel glass skin with eyes so dark with black under them yet she still stands with a beam that makes you scared to look at it. Because if you look at her. No. because if I looked at her, i knew she would look at me. I dont want her to look at me.
I sleep next to people and think of her all night long.
February
Chapter 4
Georgia has seen me from my window. We’re both opening our doors/windows and coming out to the balcony. I light up at the sight of her. Something about georgia brings my hyperactive little inner child out. “ WHAT UP BITCH” i scream and she just laughs. Because thats just what she does. She laughs more than she talks. And when she laughs. Its from within. It occurs through her whole body. It swings her whole body in perfect coordination of a person full of life and goodness. I love georgia. I dont think she even knows it.
‘Do you want to get out of here” i ask, she checks the time on her phone, its past 7, she says yes.
I’m dressed very pretty, with a white vintage shirt with deep neck forming a bow at my boobs, a red vingate cortrage jacket on top with straight jeans and doc martens. I look bisexual and i am.
We open the doors of our basements at the same time, we see each other, and we both light up, i run to her, we start to walk i am not thinking of her i am not thinking of anyone.
“LOOK MAVIS”
“WHAT THE FUCK”
Mavis stands there, infront of her house apparently. She is in black with black under her eyes with her dark messy hair in a bun. She is looking down on her phone.
“THATS HER HOUSE??” i scream at georgia in a whisper. “WHY THE FUCK DID YOU NEVER TELL ME”
“YES THATS HER HOUSE FELICE AND I TOLD YOU”
“NO YOU BITCH YOU SAID SHE LIVED AROUND HERE YOU DID NOT TELL ME WHICH HOUSE”
What georgia dosent know is that i have history with this house. Deep rooted history. These co incidences with mavis need to stop happening or i will lose the leftover of my mind.
Just as we get to infront of her house, a street dog starts to bark and comes between georgia and i. It separates us.
And both of us we pause. On the left of me right next to me is mavis. But i turn my back to her because i can not do this. Not now. Not here. I look to georgia who is on the other side of the road laughing at me. I mouth to her “DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS TO ME” she just laughs. The dog is between us and it looks like it wants to kill me.
“Georgia.” i say, loud enough for mavis to hear, but i would not know what her reaction is to all this because my back is to her. But i know she is looking.
“Georgia.” i say again and i am going to kill her when this dog goes away and we start to walk again.
I say to hell to my fear of that god damn dog and i start to walk again. The god damn dog does not follow us thank god. Georgia comes to my side again , i put my arm in hers and i scream whisper in her ear “YOU DUMB FUCKING BITCH” and she just laughs.
But im too happy to kill her right now. This can not be another one of the coincidences.
“What a god damn coincidence though, that she comes our right at the time we come out” i say to georgia and she agrees. We go to the park, in the park we walk in circles and i let georgia talk about her life because i dont want to be a selfish bitch who only wants to talk about her shit. But hell yes i am desperately waiting for her to finish telling me her lore so i can once again start with my “when the fuck will you get me a picture of mavis or her id or her number or something”. When she is done with her lore and when im done telling her to block all the guys she is talking to i ask her. She laughs and tells me i like her. I say yes. They lock the park so we have to walk in circles outside around the park and im yapping when a scooter passes and georgia screams something in a language i dont know but understand.
“UHSFJSBFJS” she says while pointing to the scooter that has long turned to our home street.
Yes it was mavis.
When we walk in circles around the park it means we walk through 4 streets. Or around a almost circular park which consists of completely different sides or streets, so is it a co incidence that mavis ended up coming from her scooter through the street that I was walking on to the street I was walking on at the time I was walking on it? She could have taken 10 different ways to get to our street. None of which would have given her a view of where i was. But she chose the one i was on.
‘ITS HER??”
“ GOD YES DREA”
We naturally hold hands and run towards our home street, where she turned. When we are close enough we stop. She is infront of her house again, standing beside her scooter with a girl georgia says is her friend. She does not look up once. Georgia is still holding my hand trying to get me to walk, leading me. Georgia is holding my hand moving forward while my head is turned as backwards as humanly possible and im looking at her like child seeing her superhero for the first time, too stunned to say a word, there are stars in my eyes. My feet are moving while my eyes are not. Im looking her in the way conan gray looks at heather except shes the one standing and im the one walking by and my eyes walk by trying to paint and engrave her in my mind.
The god damn dog clings to her, she looks down at him, pets him and laughs when he barks.
She can laugh? She laughs? She gets a dimple when she laughs. Like me. I have never heard a prettier laugh before.
She does not look up even once. She has a mole right next to her ear. I want to remember this. This picture this sound. Forever.
But little did i know that that something about her was too holy for the person i was then. And the universe had clocked angel timings of our stars aligning and it was not then.
So till the next time I see her, i forget what she looks and sounds like.
Chapter 5
March
It is march and the leaves are green.ive been putting black under my eyes since the last month. It struck me after my first week of decorating my eyes with black everyday that who i might look like. I did not put it on to look like her, i happened to just be like her. Black was just as much mine till i realised who else it belongs to. I forgot about her the next day again.
Ive been at partial home since the last 3 days, ive been going to the park everyday since the last 3 days and staring up at her balcony waiting for her to come out, she has a few times, her dog has too, she does not know i exits.
The first day i was here, 3 days ago, i and georgia were hanging out in the park, a woman with her son had been walking since an hour, right when they were about to cross the hour mark georgia told me whos mother and brother it was.
‘Thats her brother and mother?”
‘Yes god how many times do you want to hear it”
‘Why did you not say anything since an hour”
Them being her brother and mother makes them a subject of my attention and gaze, so just as i try to get a glance i see that they are looking at me every time they pass by us, they probably have been doing that since an hour and i did not fucking know.
Maturity is realising that most of the times when people like that are staring at you like you are a slut , they are thinking about how pretty you are, they are thinking about that one significant person in their life that you resemble.
Oh dearest woman do you think i look like your daughter
Oh dearest brother do you think i am someone your sister would so love.
I guess we will never know.
Chapter 6
March 16: the day the moon falls in love with its phases
I have called georgia 10 times and she wont answer. I have texted her 20 times. All im asking is for her to come out at her window. I text her once again “ my god georgia keller do you understand i am in big trouble come out now.”
I wait by my window which is a sliding door to the balcony waiting. When she finally comes out already laughing I scream. What the fuck is wrong with me she asks. I tell her we’re in trouble. She asks me to form one complete sentence for once. So I talk.
“I'm out of clothes”
“You arent naked”
“No i mean i'm out of clothes that i can wear in front of her”
“Oh wow when is the date”
“Georgia i know i am going to see her today”
“How”
“BECAUSE I AM OUT OF CLOTHES I WANT HER TO SEE ME IN SO SHE WILL SEE ME TODAY THAT IS HOW LIFE WORKS HAVE YOU NEVER LIVED”
“Wear whatever felicity”
I wear the one oversized grey tshirt I have left that is not in the laundry. It says new York in the corner. New York, my calling, New york, my dream, my goal , my ambition , my purpose.
“Do you think she will like this”
She takes a while to answer and i die
“Yes”
“You're lying”
She makes a face, laughs and goes back inside. It is what I wear because I do not have any options.
We play tennis for 2 hours later in the court and then i hang out with georgia and her so called friends, i mostly stay quiet i don't like them, one of them tells me that i look like mavis, i am beyond flattered and i look at georgia because to the other girl it is just a comment she made to me, to her it is a compliment, to me and to georgia, it is all i needed.
Sam finds me and decides to stay with me and them. Sam is my 7 year old brother that lives at a partial home. He loves me, he annoys the shit out of me and I love him so much it makes me cry. He refuses to go back
“I'm staying with you”
“Fine.'' I grunt and let him stay. He won't last, I know.
3 minutes pass by after he says “i want to go home’
“Fine i'll take you”
“No you will come too”
“I'm not going anywhere sam, either you stay too or i can take you home” i grunt again.
He folds his arms and pouts like a little hopeful angry child.
Little does he know he is about to change my whole world.
When it is getting dark I listen to him and we decide to go home, georgia too, right as we are on the street that leads to her house i see someone standing. And it's her.
I scream something to georgia something along the lines of “uiahaifbaisjfbcfia” just as i hold sams little hand and yell at him
“SAM IT IS THE APOCALYPSE THE STARS ARE FALLING WE NEED TO RUN”
And like a seven year old child he runs with his heart beating fast as I give him a moment he will never forget.
And i won't either.
For all the different reasons
Just as we are about to reach her house i stop and in a very calm voice i say
“The apocalypse is over, good job sammy we survives”
She is cleaning her motorbike.
I hold sam's hand and we start to walk forward with his head in the front and mine on the side, i try to get as much sight as i can, to weave it into poetry, into whatever she makes me feel. Just as we are about to pass by i stop and i turn.
Because this is the moment. I dont realise it at the time. But that was the moment.
Something in me tells me it's her turn now.
So i stop and i turn
And with my seven year old brother i play pretend, just that between i, sam and mavis only i know it is pretend play.
“Where did Georgia go” i say, we’re standing in front and pretty close to Mavis so she can hear me too. I couldn't care less where Georgia was right now.
She stops cleaning her bike and she stands up, facing my side as I face forward.
“ come on lets go felic” sam says in his childlike voice
“No we need to wait for georgia sam”
And i can feel her cannabilistic eyes on me. Caressing me, killing me, touching me in whispers that leave imprints that dont wash away. I can feel her looking me. I can feel her eyes move on me, every inch of me, top to bottom.
I can feel her looking at me and i have never felt so seen.
Her gaze lasts. For what feels like forever. And maybe it was. Because even it wasnt, it is going to last forever.
Then she starts to move and starts getting on her bike, and i say “georgia can probably come on her own come on” and i turn and walk away with sam.
Chapter 7
March 16, the night
When im just about to open the door and take sam in georgia comes i tell her what happens and i say “i told you i would see her today”
She smiles and she laughs. She is happy for me. I love her.
๋࣭⭑⋆⭒˚.☆☆๋࣭ ⭑⋆⭒˚.⋆
I sit with my back to my sliding doors and call phoebe to tell her. Just as i am swinging my head up and down while telling her which she can not see but i know she is picturing it, georgia calls, it rings in between my call with phoebe, i ignore it and keep talking.
It rings again.
And again.
I turn back to grab my charger and i see georgia at her window in complete and utter distress jumping and pointing to the phone with her hands asking me to pick up.
I mouth “what”
She mouths back “pick the damn phone”
Georgia is never this crazy.
I tell phoebe ill call her back and i pick up georgias.
We’re basically looking at each other through our windows but we are hearing each others voices through our phones.
“MAVIS IS IN THE PARK”
“I-WHAT- HOW DO YOU KNOW”
“ALEXA CALLED ME AND TOLD ME”
“WHAT IS-”
“WHEN WE WERE LEAVING I ASKED ALEXA TO CALL ME IF SHE SAW HER AND SHE CALLED AND SHE IS IN THE PARK RIGHT NOW SO GET YOUR SHIT AND COME DOWN”
God do i love her more than ever now.
“I cant.
“What- felice, you-”
“We just came back plus sam wont let me.”
“Felicity.”
“Okay fine, after my coffee. Be ready. Its a sneak out”
I push my coffee down my throat ruin the pleasure of it and run to change, from the clothes in the laundry i pick a pink tshirt with graphics on it. Pretty goth. Andi change as fast as i can. I put my docs on and i tell them im going down to skateboard. And i run.
I take my skate board from the basement and realise that it was the perfect excuse. She gets to see me with my skateboard now.
And all this is coincidence. Under normal circumstances I would still be wearing that old ass tshirt and not carrying my skateboard.
Georgia comes out of her house and we start to walk as fast as we can and as if it came naturally to us, we hold hands like little girls, and run.
She is walking around with her mother. She has changed into a white plain oversized tee.
Her tee says new york.
We start to to walk in the opposite directions to her meaning that around a circular path, we will meet twice. They probably will think we are lunatics for walking in the wrong direction but they will meet us twice.
I tell georgia to get pictures. She hesitates and panics and i yell at her to act like she is taking selfies but take pictures of her. So for that one beautiful half hour of my life georgia fixes her hair infront of her phone as she takes pictures on my mavis.
It is dark street lights in the hues of yellow and even though she is with her mother and i am with georgia, to any one watching our movie and to mavis and i looking back, there are only the two of us. She looks at me when i dont look at her. Or maybe that is just in my head.
Soon georgia points out that both our hair are in messy buns and both of us walk with our hands back.
When i finally get the courage to look up as they pass us and i am only one human away from her, i look up
Her mother glares
I look back down.
I can hear whispers of what they're talking about. But i can not quite make out what.
Next time that i look up she does to and for one little tiny silly second our eyes meet and our world start to melt into each others and we look back down.
When they are about to leave we happen to be passing by the the exit too, we cant leave at the same time or they will know. So our decision is to keep walking.
Some one from outside yells something that i cant make out except for the fact that they are calling someone. Georgia and i turn. Her and her mother stop too at the exit.
I dont know who it was or what they said or what happened next all i know is that i did not look at her and georgia did and georgia whispered in my ear
“She stared at you in a way i did not know she could, hell she could even care to look at someone”
And i smile. Like i have never before.
And just if sam hadnt refused to go home and just if i hadnt listened to him at the moment that i did and just if i had not created the apocalypse and just if
Chapter 8
Balcony
This is my last day here, i go home at night today. It feels wrong to call it home though.
I dont want to leave before night, i want to see her. One last time. Please god.
Georgia and i spend the afternoon trying to find her childhood photos on georgia's old computer because her brother kind of knows mavis's brother. We don't find anything. By 5 we are bored to death and decide to go out. But i have no hopes because the sky is a blank bright blue screen of light. Where light goes, mavis never goes. So i dont even try to convince georgia to go to the park i let her take me wherever she wants to. We meet alexa, georgia's frenemy. The three of us end up in the park eventually anyways. I make them sit on the bench that gives me the view of her house if I look up. Which is what i do while alexa talks straight to my face and i nod knowing damn i dont give one fuck. The one time I look down, I hear a voice.
And even though i've never heard her voice before i know it is hers and i look up.
She is in the balcony with her mother and are talking down to a parcel guy.
And coincidentally enough mavis does not know my presence but she has felt it and has turned to look and then turned back.
For every time our eyes meet like that, one more star of the story of our constellation aligns.
She goes in and then she comea back out and i can feel her looking at me so i act like im on my phone.
Georgia tells me that i can act normal once shes gone.
I am so eternally grateful and in the most humane way i want more now.
Then she does something that i would never have seen coming in the most predictables of novels and stories.
She goes in and she comes back out, but this time with a plastic chair. She places it in the corner and she sits. And she looks straight into the darkness inside me and i look right back but i am too flattered by the gesture that i maybe almost smile too and i think she sees it.
Maybe she just wanted to sit outside
Or maybe she wanted to look at me, from afar, like i do her.
And that was the moment sam decided to come in and drag me out of the park because he wanted me to play with him so i dragged georgia with me. On the way to his playdate place i beg him to let me go back. If she is there for me i need to fucking run and go back right now, lord knows when her lightning will strike me again. I make sam promises i know will break his heart if i dont fullfill, i tell him ill watch his favourite movie with him when we go home i tell him ill read new books to him and play chess with him. He gets upset and looks sad but he lets me go. I tell him im sorry and i turn and i dont look back.
Georgia and i do not even look at each other to give some sort of acknowledgment of our telepathic. We walk till we’re out of sams sight and then we run. Like there is an actual apocalypse. I can barely breathe and we’re still running when i scream to her because there is no such thing as talking while running whem youre running that fast there is only screaming. “If she is still there when we get back it means she was not sitting for me.” i scream. “And if she is not there and has gone back inside that means she was there for me and went back in when i went. RIGHT GEORGIA” it is a rhetorical question and she knows it so she just laughs.
When we get back there she is gone.
Chapter 9
Finding the green
It feels wrong to call this home just as much it feels wrong to be here now. I feel like the breathe has been sucked out of me. Like all the oxygen in the world has just sworn to be anywhere but here. How do i stay trapped in these walls that i have only ever bled in when the healing spells of my wounds get recited somewhere else. How do i stay here in these walls where every corner is haunted when the ghosts im friends with are somewhere else.
Somewhere else being where ever mavis is. How do i stay inside four walls and a roof when i have been offered a whole new life outside. While i lie awake through out the night because it is the closest i feel to her, i figure out why she makes me feel the way she does.
The house mavisgrew up in is the house that is very vividly imrinted in the fading of memories half of which i am not sure are dreams or real. I think i was maybe 6 or 7 or 8. Playing hide and seek in the street that was an escape from monster house but felt just as haunted because it was always an escape. I always knew i would have to go back to the monster house. But the ghosts of the escape house and i became friends at a very young age. They still scared me, but they got me toys. And i was a child. I loved toys.
I dont think i was ever happy in the escape house. I was only ever escaping. Running. How could you run from the monsters and be happy while doing it. But the destination was back to the monster house so i had to learn to enjoy the road and not think of the destination.
In the escape house, there were people, who loved me, but did not love themselves enough. In the escape house, i was a child in the corner of a 4 storey house. In that house i knew my mother was broken. But so was father. In that house i was behind the curtain that they used to hide it all from me. I was a child i was not blind. And they put a curtain over my eyes but i could still hear their screaming haunting voices. And i knew.
Escape house felt safe from the wolves to a child who was going to grow up and become a wolf herself. Escape house gave safety to the child who was just a child and did not understand. The child thought that if just ran away from the monsters and went to the escape house, all would be right. She thought if she ran away from the screaming voices, they would cease to exist. But she was just a little far from the voices. They were still loud. They always were. They always are. And she was just was away from the monsters, but the monsters were still alive. She could never kill them. She could not kill them and they refused to eat her too. They chew her out alive. But the monsters refused to swallow her. Refused to kill her for once and all. Monster house was made of rooms with walls built of suffering and torture.
The child confused the safety of the escape house for comfort.
And all that comfort came crumbling down when the escape house did.
She would never have that comfort again.
She would never spend those safe nights in the illusion like safe escape house ever again. Because it no longer existed.
One day while i was staying at the escape house, i played hide and seek. And i hid in a house that was teal blue and had a very rusted and old door. I had never hidden there before and i was scared. I remember climbing the stairs and thinking i would die. I remember the pink on the inside and the big window with mesh on it and i remember thinking i did not like that house and that i would never come here again.
That is the house mavis lives in.
And just when i thought i could never have the comfort and safety of the escape house ever again.
I saw mavis.
She is like the imaginary friend i had as a child who i talked to about my monsters just that the imaginary friend has come to life. If to be with me is to bathe in those nights then she gives me darkness of those nights.
By Aastha Nagi
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