By Yash Desai
This question has been plaguing me for a long time. Obviously, humans live in fear of the unknown. We have all some day or the other woken up with that feeling. That feeling so indescribable. That feeling that brings a cold shiver so far down your spine that you forget your identity, your hopes and your dreams. You wake up, your body ice cold but still sweating profusely, your heartbeat fluctuating dramatically. That lump in your throat that is so profound that however many times you swallow, trying to grip that last sense of being grounded to this universe you are unable to push back that feeling. That chill of icy heat, that feeling that your very existence is meaningless.
My worst fear is knowing that someday or the other I'm going to witness death. Deaths so tragic, your voice cracks and your tears well, but you don't have the power to cry. You don't know if you will hear their voice again. You don't know if they will be remembered. You don't know if this is all a twisted simulation where the people who you meet, share bonds with and so deeply share moments with is a heart wrenching game of life, made
to tear people apart. You don't know that they will remember you. That, is the scariest and most disturbing thing I’ve ever felt in this existential crises so vaguely described with four letters.
It feels as if if humankind is perpetually afraid of death. However, if you think about it, humans are deathly afraid of time. Death is just a byproduct of time. Time is what causes objects to decay, bonds as strong as steal to rust. Fundamentally, humans have fear of what they have no control over. This branches out over several rabbit holes that all end in the same continuous outcome....Time. We humans have a tendency to do whatever it takes just to have control or have power over something so variable that it is never-ending and dynamic. It is this power that we try so hard to attain toa say in this world full of voices. One of the main examples is money. In this world it is our mortality that is both are greatest strength and most crippling vulnerability. It almost drives you crazy that in this life which is so carefully engineered that our mortality is put to the test so much that we feel like we are in a mere simulation of a matrix where everything is cruelly engineered so that our bodies, a mere medium for our soul is wrapped around in an endless conspiracy where the lines of code that create our world chain us. And time, is the unforgiving warden.
Time is a coffin. Let me explain this statement through the example of a Rolex. Its a beautiful contraption, that cannot be denied. However, it is a testament to the fact that adorning time is nothing but a status symbol, a slight grip over power as mentioned before. No matter how you decorate time, it is still, at its core, an unchained beast. In fear what this beast can do to you, you try and have power to control the 'matrix' through having power over money. At its core, time is a paradox, simply located in a casket. The casket symbolizes how unforgiving time is and how cruel the jailkeeper can be. However, instead of adorning the coffin with hopes of money which inevitably
transcends into greed, we cannot make it part of our life to race against time through status symbols and greed. Instead we should enjoy our tango with time, however brief it may be. And above all, most importantly, we should enjoy our life but still be mindful of the coffin and at the end of the day, I want that tombstone to leave a mark, not make a mark.
By Yash Desai
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